All posts tagged baby

Oh No…

Published February 21, 2012 by Hemlock

I originally was going to post about my own issues today, but after reading Elphie’s update/post about Mo, my issues now seem insignificant.  My heart aches for her, and I can’t possibly imagine the pain and suffering she’s going through right now.  To finally get this far, and then have it all come crashing down.  I don’t know what I would do in her place.

On a side note, I’m back on my happy pills.  I was incredibly hyper-emotional, and was spiraling downhill very quickly.  Again, though, it all seems quite insignificant compared to what Mo is going through.


It’s A Clown Car

Published August 3, 2010 by Hemlock

I went to MSN earlier today, and was pursuing the normal headlines of disgruntled employees shooting people, natural disasters, and how to raise your children. Now, generally, I try to avoid a particular overtly productive family whenever they make the headlines, but I couldn’t stop myself from clicking when I saw this: Michelle Duggar: I would have a 20th Child.

Are… you… fucking… kidding… me…?

How is it possible that her uterus is possibly still intact? How is this not considered compulsive hoarding? Or even an addiction?

Supposedly their belief system enables them to ‘have as any children as God blesses them with’. I really just don’t understand this way of thinking. They’re not able to parent their children effectively; not with that many children.

Financially, they can cope, and their children are provided for. Emotionally, though? No, no support there. The oldest children are caring for their younger siblings. They’re being forced to grow up at an exponential rate simply because their parents can’t seem to use a condom or birth control pills.

Stealing someone’s youth and childhood should be considered a cardinal sin. It creates monsters who fill our headlines with rape, murder, and suicide.

I won’t even bring up the argument of there being so many children available for adoption because there’s always going to be children up for adoption, just like there will always be dogs and cats in the pound that need homes as well. It’s a problem that will never go away.

Either way, their behavior is not something that should be rewarded in any way. The attention and money they get from the TV show they have, and various speeches that I’m sure they do, are doing nothing other than feeding their addiction.

People herald Michelle Duggar as a ‘super mom’, but what mothering is she doing? Yes, she home schools her kids. Well, my mom did that and no one heralded her as a super mom.

This is a family clan that is headed by two sick people who should really be in therapy. People have had their children taken away from them for less than what is occurring within this family.

I just don’t get it.

I just found out I’m superstitious

Published June 23, 2010 by Hemlock

I had my IUI on Friday of last week and that same week two of the other women on the CraigsList forums went in for their own procedures. One went in for her IVF transfer, and the other went in for her IVF retrieval.

Overall, pretty normal except for one thing. It seems that whenever a group of three of us go in for some sort of procedure that same group of three manages to come out pregnant at the end of their two week wait. I took this as a good sign.

Today, I logged into the forum as the woman who had her retrieval done on Friday was due to have her embryo’s transferred. As far as the info any of us had, it was looking really good. All of the eggs that were fertilized via petri dish were apparently developing on schedule, so it was just a matter of picking the best of the bunch and transfer those over to her.

However, apparently all was not going well. She posted today, that she was in the office, gown on and ready to go, when the nurse and doctor came in to tell her that the transfer was canceled. Something had happened to the embryos, and they didn’t know what.

One of our sacred Group of Three had faltered. This was not good. I sat there, looking at the forum posting, panicking a little. What does this mean for me? The circle had now been broken, I couldn’t help but think that I might be doomed.

The truth of the matter, though, is that there’s nothing I can do about it. Either the IUI works, or it doesn’t. DH’s sperm count was great for what was available (long story), his motility was off the chart, and quality was excellent. So, it’s all up to me, now. They think there’s a good, solid chance of twins on this one… a little bit scary.

I’ve ordered 26 pregnancy tests to test out the HCG trigger shot, and I’ll readily admit that I’ll be testing like crazy after that. DH thinks I’m a bit obsessive, and that I’m just going to make my paranoia worse, but I don’t know what else to do. Something could happen, and I could get an early positive and that would enable us to get a better handle on hormone levels early on. On the other hand if I continue to get negative tests, and it turns out I’m not pregnant, at least I’ve been preparing day by day for the news I’m not pregnant again.